Escape and appreciation

Early next week I will be in Chicago on business. Do you know how long it has been since I have used that phrase? Well, it feels like I never actually did. I know it has only been five years, but it truly feels like may career occurred a lifetime ago - like it happened when I was someone else. And I suppose that's not really far from the truth.

Anyone will tell you being a mother is a job unto itself. You'll nod when you hear that, and maybe if you're like me, you'll think, "Don't be so overly dramatic. It's not rocket science." But you might be curious about it. And if you're female, you might have that whole hormone thing happen, and you'll give it a try.

Motherhood really isn't rocket science, but it can - for me, anyway - take everything you have to give. Now I admit I tend to throw myself into things, feet first, but I really do feel my job as a mom is all-encompassing. And I absolutely love it. I love deciding what nutritious, well-balanced meals to serve every day. I love working with both girls on their academics, and finding fun ways to keep them challenged. I am highly motivated to protect the girls, and help them work through the messages they get from the media concerning our world and culture. I love building memories and starting traditions. And, selfishly, I just love to be around and watch the them grow. For these reasons, I have chosen to work for others in limited amounts, and only when I can do it from home.

Besides, what do I have to pine for? I had years to follow my career path, attend graduate school, test the limits of my capabilities, and prove that I could take care of myself.

That said, the grass can still look greener on the other side. Sometimes. I have what I believe to be a larger than average number of friends with no kids, and man, can their freedom look appealing*. I can hardly imagine what it would be like to not have to plan for big costs like educations and weddings, as well as the little costs that balloon for unknown reasons, like the value of fresh fruit on your grocery list. I cringe with dismay at the invitations I have to turn down to go to multiple concerts in a month, or to fly last-minute to Amsterdam. I cheer with half-hearted enthusiasm for couples who schedule regular, long vacations alone together in warm climates. I sneer silently at their complaints of having to worry about their pets while away from home. Though these thoughts can make me feel like a bad person, I know they're fairly normal.

Thus, I am not hiding the fact that I am looking forward to being in a hotel for a couple days. No laundry to do. No bathrooms to clean. No one replying, 'No!' or 'WHY?' to everything I say, just to test my resolve. I will have uninterrupted hours in the evenings of quiet for reading or flipping through the TV. I will be dining out in a cool town packed with fabulous restaurants. I will meet new professionals in interesting businesses, and (hopefully) add value to my small but growing company.

And as much as I love being home, there's nothing like travel to make you pleasantly introspective. I love that feeling of being myself, but out of my usual environment. It's almost like trying on a new hat. Or going by a different name. Or something like that. Anyway, it makes me take a new view of life, in a refreshing way. Hopefully I'll come back a renewed person ready to hunker back down into the mom life I already love.

Or at least I'll have some new experiences to write about.

*Please know that I am fully aware of how incredibly lucky I am. I have one daughter, and a step-daughter who is with us about half-time. Both girls are unusually healthy and wonderfully sweet-natured. I am aware and deeply grateful that my life is piled high with blessings, especially compared to families with many kids, or those with a chronic illness to manage. Just so you know.