At a loss

I am simultaneously a shell of jagged, bleeding edges and a bottomless well of calmness and determination.  More of the former, but the latter when it's required.  This is so unbelievably hard, I honestly don't know how we're going to get to The Other Side.  But as I told her all weekend, there's no way around it.  We just have to go through it, together, and there is no failure allowed.  We can't bear to think of that option, even when she begs us to consider it.  God, please, please help us.