(Pinching the bridge of her nose in dismay)

Over lunch:

J: "Mommy, Kate sure has a long way to go before she becomes a mom."

Me: "Yes, she does." [Hopefully.]

J: "And I have way longer than she does!"

[Oh, boy, where is this going?]

J: "First I have to be a big kid, then a teenager...."

Me: [Let's test these waters...] "...and a grown-up, then fall in love and get married, and..."

J: "Wait, no, Mommy! You don't have to get married....I mean...do you?" (insert dubious look here)

Me: [OH MY GOD WHY IS SHE LOOKING AT ME LIKE I'M CRAZY?? Stay calm.] "Well, you don't have to, but that's the better way to do it..."

As my voice trailed off, I thought of her announcement to Jon last week that she does not believe in Santa Claus (because, obviously, reindeer can't fly...I mean come ON). His insistence that Santa's reindeer are special apparently fell on deaf ears. I am holding out hope that she still has a slight inclination to believing. Five can't be the end already, can it?

I stared at her for a minute, waiting for more questions, but J pretty much got bored with me and changed the subject. I thought of K, who at 9 was convinced you could only get pregnant if you were married, and at 11 had to be told there is no Santa Claus. I am so screwed with this one.